Wednesday, May 21, 2008

I am Wearing Abraham Lincoln's Clothes

Over on his blog, John Hodgman, the Smartest Man I Have Ever Heard Of, informs us that a woman named Jane Epenson has Ringo Starr's clothing.

This is very interesting to me, because I have Abraham Lincoln's clothing. In fact, I am wearing them right now. This presents a problem as I am 5'5" and Lincoln was 6'4". I fall down a lot because I step on the pant cuffs and my arms look like they have been amputated. Oh, and the stovepipe hat comes down past my nose. (Please do not ask about the underwear and no, I do not want to go to the theater tonight).

I also understand that preservationists find the idea of anyone wearing Lincoln's original clothes to be very upsetting, so I must ask forgiveness, but I cannot help the situation because, for the first time in years, my wife finds me to be very sexy.

Thank you for your help.